September is National Suicide Prevention Month: About Suicide & Mental Health Stigma

September is National Suicide Prevention Month. 

Please help share this resource, as you never know whose life you might save. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is available 24/7 at: 1-800-273-8255.

https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ 

 

Mental health stigma still has us in the Dark Ages

Boot Straps Stoicism has killed more people than anything I know in the form of alcoholism, addiction, suicide, and the long slow death of denial and (C)PTSD.  Depression, anxiety, and PTSD are not illnesses to be scorned or defects of character - they are neuro-psychological responses to extreme stress in numerous forms that affect every one differently and are NOT to be shamed by ignorant bystanders who would lay judgments on people struggling.

While it's getting better, mental health stigma still persists like a bad dream, even today. So, while addiction and suicide rates climb, competent qualified mental health professionals are at a premium, and often difficult to find in rural areas and small towns.  Good mental health care can be found if you know where to look.  The search is worth the effort, and this blog has a number of links on our home page to get you started.

Self-Help Strategies

 

If you are struggling with mental health symptoms and are uncomfortable seeking a therapist, counselor, or life coach, then get out a notebook, and START WRITING.  Write whatever comes into your head, don't censor it, and UNLOAD.  When the paper owns it, you'll be able to look at it and see yourself more clearly.  This is the first step to well being.

No one knows better than you do what you are thinking and feeling, and the pen and paper are your vehicle to clear the channel, especially if you are bogged down in hopelessness, feelings of despair and raging emotion.  Remember, suicide is permanent, and feeling wretched might feel like it will last forever, but if the paper becomes your friend, then you can process those feelings and move thru them.  Being emotionally stuck is like being constipated, something has got to come out.
 

What about online coaching & therapy?

Studies have shown that online therapies can be quite effective for those dealing with suicidal thoughts. Even texting can be an effective intervention. What's important is reaching out for help, instead of suffering and staying stuck because it seems like there's nowhere to turn.

Below is a link to an interesting scientific article on suicide prevention.  If you're feeling over whelming symptoms of distress, as outlined below, please seek professional mental health care.  There's no need to be miserable and suffer endlessly alone!

 

 

Suicide Prevention and Texting: Easier Than You Might Think

Text Following Hospital Discharge Suicide Intervention 

 https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5745353/

 

 

Stages of Change - Why We Fail

Are you having difficulty making a needed change? Quitting smoking, losing 20 pounds, ending a toxic relationship, stopping that social media doom scrolling, etc.? You know what I mean. You "know you should stop", but you don't, can't, or won't. And with every failed attempt, you feel bad, beat yourself up, and then eat another Twinkie.

Welcome to the human race. All the insight in the world rarely leads to permanent behavior change. We know we should, if only we could. But, don't despair, change can and does happen in a very patterned and predictable way. It's all well documented by the Stages of Change Theory* (see link below). 

 Stages of Change - Why We Fail

And once you understand the process, it can help you along the way. You're not defective, or a failure. It's only that we tend to underestimate the effort required to create lasting change and it's easier to fall back into old patterns. Once we understand the stages of change, we can more easily make successful attempts to reach a goal.

In a future article, I will outline my experience going thru the stages of change to quit smoking. Until then, get acquainted with the stages of change.

*Reference: Raihan N, Cogburn M. Stages of Change Theory. [Updated 2023 Mar 6]. In: StatPearls [Internet]. Treasure Island (FL): StatPearls Publishing; 2026 Jan-. National Library of Medicine.  https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK556005/

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What's Fun Got To Do With It?

What's Fun Got To Do With It?  Asking the Right Questions

Sometimes our mental health hinges on asking the right questions. When experiencing a bout of depression or anxiety, it may become easy to pathologize our current state i.e., view our condition as psychologically unhealthy or abnormal.  Certainly, in the present day environment of being trauma-informed, it seems like all the focus is on healing childhood "wounds" or grieving losses in adulthood.  But, what if it wasn't as complicated as all that?  What if we've been asking the wrong questions?  What if focusing on how bad we feel, or our anxiety was better dealt with by making a slight shift in our mindset?  This is where the question: What's Fun Got To Do With It? comes in.

When was the last time you had a roaring belly laugh?  Or grinned from ear-to-ear so hard your face hurt?  When was the last time you intentionally set out to have fun?  Do you even know what fun feels like anymore?  Fun is a necessary prelude to joy.  Fun brings us lightheartedness.  Fun is a giant stress reliever.  It resets our nervous system and offers a coffee break from becoming over focused on the negative.  Fun is a respite from the daily grind of life's responsibilities and chores.  Fun and laughter bond us to the people we care about and creates memories we share together.  Fun brings us back into balance and shifts our perspective making life worthwhile.  Fun eliminates the drudgery we can get caught up in when we work too hard.  Fun helps recharge and rejuvenate our physical energy.  It can also provide the space we need to shift into problem solving mode, instead of endlessly ruminating.

Just like getting enough sleep can reduce stress and anxiety levels, fun makes it easier to cope with emotional challenges.  There's something to be said for gallows humor.  At the end of his life, my father developed Lewy-Body dementia.  In our morning phone call, I would always ask him, "What's going on?", and he would reply, "You're asking me?".  Even though my Dad's memory was slowly waning, he never lost his sense of humor and was able to laugh at himself to keep going.

Here's a challenge for you.  Make a list of the top ten activities that make you laugh, smile, giggle, or feel joy.  Make sure to add silly nonsensical items to the list.  Then the next time you feel super anxious or depressed, pull out this list and do the quickest activity you can manage in the moment.  Take time to lighten up, put your emotions into perspective, and recognize not all negative feelings mean we are suffering from ongoing trauma or wounds.  

Here's my top ten list of fun mental health activities:

1.   Watch YouTube videos of the Beatles. 

2.   Joy ride in the car to my favorite rock-n-roll tunes.

3.   Watch the sunset over the beach.

4.   Pull goofy faces in the mirror.

5.   Watch dance videos on YouTube.

6.   Go to a Comedy Open Mic night.

7.   Tell Knock-Knock jokes to my friends.

8.   Pull a prank or practical joke on a friend.

9.   Listen to an oldie but goody AM radio station.

10.  Make up irreverent words to my favorite songs.

You get the point.  I leave you with a laugh track video from my YouTube channel. 

A fun laugh track from a sketch comedy improv writing session with my friend, Stan. 

In loving memory of Stan Fleisher, soulmate and running partner.  May he RIP.

 

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If you found value or have benefited from this post, I would love to hear from you below in the comments.

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Living Large Coaching & Counseling
It's Your Life. Your Evolution.